[Women] April meeting

Tue Apr 7 11:15:33 CDT 2020

When was a time in your life when you had to start over?  Yes - a very thoughtful question.  Thank you for raising it.
I'll speak to the time that brought me to the Mid-Ohio Area.  I had had a lot of practice starting over because Pat and I had agreed that his career decisions would take precedence over mine.  So, we had been in New York, Pennsylvania, and many locations in Ohio.  Circumstances changed, though, when he retired and I, having completed my doctoral studies, accepted my first position at Georgia Southern University.  I really liked the overall university, the location was close to one of Pat's daughters and her young family, and my teaching assignment (language development, methods of teaching reading and language arts, and supervision of pre-service teachers in the field) was a good match.  The problem was the person who was the head of our division within the College of Education.  After three years, the work dynamics made life unbearable.  For my own mental health, I needed to leave.  There were other issues, too: my mother's failing health, Pat's first bout with cancer and other ongoing health concerns, our dissatisfaction with the HEAT and social dishonesty of the South.  Anyway, I asked myself where would I choose to live?  The answer was the Marietta area.  I had attended a conference here in years past and remembered its atmosphere.  When I looked in the Chronicle of Higher Education, there was an advertisement for a position at WVU at Parkersburg with a split responsibility in the Humanities Division, especially Developmental Education (teaching strategic skills for reading, study, and writing for success in college) and in the Teacher Education Division (methods of teaching language development and literacy).  It was my dream job, in my first choice of locations.  In the interviewing and visiting process, I met Rebecca Phillips and learned of her connection with FUUSM.  Pat and I had "flirted" with UU-ism over the years, but now I could see a coherence in my future --  a job doing all the things I liked to do, in a good institution, in a location close to my family, and with connection to a compatible spiritual community.  We moved over Christmas break in 2000 -- a tough and cold transition -- and I started the new job in January of 2001.  That start-over decision was the best one I ever made.  Being part of this Beloved Community had made all the difference.  Thank you.  Martha

From: Annie Warmke via Women 
Sent: Tuesday, April 07, 2020 11:06 AM
To: women at fuusm.org 
Cc: Annie Warmke 
Subject: Re: [Women] April meeting

What a great topic!  I started over (a farmer's wife) in 1981 by hiding in a battered women's shelter and leaving everything but my 5 year old daughter behind.  I re-invented myself after that so that I graduated college, founded 22 battered women's projects/3 women's funds/17 women freed from prison who acted in self-defense, and created lots of cultural/social change through that work.  

Next time I re-invented myself was in 2002 when I left the US with nothing but our 6 year old granddaughter that we'd raised from birth.  It felt like someone had taken a giant eraser and wiped out my career, my friends, my goals but I'd promised Catlyn we would be there for her.  During the 3 1/2 years we fought in court for her I stumbled often but I found my way by writing for a newspaper about life in a small town (first France and then England) as a way to protest the invasion of Iraq after 9/11.  I volunteered at Catlyn's school to teach English to French 5 year olds, and I translated the SOS FEMMES' prostitutes health and safety "Little Blue Book".  I grew an amazing garden, made friends, traveled everywhere imaginable, and tried not to loose my mind as I mourned the life I left behind.

When we returned to the US in late 2004 I re-invented myself again as the builder of an Earthship, the first one east of the MS.  I learned how to use the Internet and social media, won custody in court of our granddaughter (that's a whole other story involving the grand jury indicting us and more), and learned to be a goat herder.  

Reinventing is a miserable experience - it's like being birthed into a new reality and trying to make sense of what works, and what doesn't.  I had hoped not to do it again, but I find myself there right now with our need to push our business online.  We'd been doing that a little at a time, but now we have had to push all of our classes and workshops to the fall with the hope that things will improve for our country's health.  While we'd had a plan to speed up the process of the transition in late 2020 we find that we must let go of everything else and just focus on this one thing for now.   Perhaps the most nerving for me is the separation physically of those I love deeply.  It is growing difficult as the days pass with no physical contact with people like our granddaughter, who is married and lives an hour away with poor transportation.  Jay and I have agreed we will sequester here until it is safe, which  means no visitors.  It is especially difficult to say "no" to former interns who would like to be here with us since they are not going to work everyday, but if we are to remain reasonably safe we need to honor our agreement to each other.

Perhaps there will be one more re-invention as I grow older and have to stop being a goat herder, and a farmer.  That work sustains me so I am making plans for how I can continue to hand on to that part of my life.  But then the best laid plans often are not how things turn out.  I hope to hear more stories from each other you.  Annie

On 4/6/2020 9:10 PM, Rebecca Phillips via Women wrote:

  Great topic!

  "If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need."-- Cicero

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  From: Women <women-bounces at fuusm.org> on behalf of Gillian via Women <women at fuusm.org>
  Sent: Monday, April 6, 2020 8:04 PM
  To: A List for the Women of FUUSM <women at fuusm.org>
  Cc: Gillian <gillianabbo at gmail.com>
  Subject: [Women] April meeting 

  Hello  
  As the host for the now cancelled April Women’s Group meeting it was suggested that I still pose a question for discussion as we do at our gathering. We can email any response that you may wish to share. I was talking with Caitlin and it is her topic.
  Hugs Gillian

  Women’s Group Topic of Discussion:
  Though these are strange and difficult times, a promising future still lingers on the horizon. The sun is shining its face, the birds are singing in their choirs, and the flowers are beginning to stretch their arms skyward. Spring is upon is. And with it comes rebirth, renewal, and hope.

  This leads me to my topic of conversation for the week. When was a time in your life where you had to start again? Find a new beginning? Start a new chapter in your life? Was it through circumstance forced upon you, or was it perhaps  spurred through your own free will? 

  There are many such occasions in an individual’s life, but I hope that we can focus on the positive. In these difficult times it’s good to remember how much we’ve already overcome and how we’ve thrived regardless. Like a dandelion through the pavement’s cracks, we will all see the light again. 

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-- 
Annie Warmke
Farmer, activist, consultant, writer
Blue Rock Station/Warmke Farm LLC
www.bluerockstation.com
(740) 674-4300 or (740) 252-6295 Mobile 

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