[Women] (no subject)

Sun Feb 7 20:50:18 CST 2021

Dear ones,

Over the last few days, I have read through the policies and procedures on the FUUSM page. We do have a sexual harassment statement and a conflict resolution procedure, and the UUA has additional resources to help congregations develop behavioral covenants and other guidelines. The good news is that it should not be difficult to build on what we have to create a formal policy with all the information in one place.

Figuring out how to "side with love" is not always easy, and we may not always get it right, but I feel very blessed to be part of such a thoughtful group of women.

Rebecca

"If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need."-- Cicero

________________________________
From: Women <women-bounces at fuusm.org> on behalf of robin--- via Women <women at fuusm.org>
Sent: Sunday, February 7, 2021 8:42 PM
To: A List for the Women of FUUSM <women at fuusm.org>
Cc: robin at bozian.com <robin at bozian.com>
Subject: Re: [Women] Women's Group Feb. 10

If in fact this information is based on second-hand knowledge, then I don't think any action should be taken against anyone. If the man who reported this is concerned, perhaps he could encourage one or more of the women to talk with Kat or someone from the board about it confidentially and then the board could take appropriate action.  It is unfair to challenge or confront someone without information directly from the person injured or harassed or a witness to such an event.  We could all be supportive of taking action if anyone has been harassed.

And, it seems that a sexual harassment policy wouldn't be a bad idea.

Robin
-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Re: [Women] Women's Group Feb. 10
From: Annie Warmke via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
Date: Sat, February 06, 2021 6:30 pm
To: amdbone--- via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
Cc: Annie Warmke <annie at bluerockstation.com<mailto:annie at bluerockstation.com>>

I outlined the sequence of events starting with July 2019 so I think the
man who brought the information did his due diligence. What has become
obvious is that we need to make sure we have adequate ways to address
sexual harassment, and perhaps even bullying.  We perhaps need to
periodically announce we are a safe space on these issues.  We're
working on something to give to the board to address the current issue,
and future issues...a strategy, if you will.  Annie

On 2/6/2021 1:17 PM, amdbone--- via Women wrote:
> After carefully reading the ongoing onslaught of emails, I have to go back to the original statement. A man told me that there are 4 women sexually harrassed...does anyone else see a problem with this? I think, normally, when hearing this sort of gossip, one has to be concerned with both men and the spreading of gossip, whether true or not. if this statement by "the man" is true, why didn't he take appropriate measures? Again, just my opinion, but it sure looks like what is needed might be as simple as board accessibility if there are sound concerns with facts.
>
>
> ---- nancy wolske via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>> The breadth of the conversation continued, so I’m glad Cindy spoke up.
>> The onus is on anyone using email to be aware of to whom you’re sending a message, especially so when someone’s being accused and named, and especially when the accuser remains anonymous and the accusation is hearsay.  Much harm can result.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone
>>
>>
>> On Saturday, February 6, 2021, 12:29 PM, Rebecca Phillips via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>>
>> #yiv4074534208 P {margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;}To all: the breadth of the conversation was accidental.
>> "If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need."-- Cicero
>> From: Women <women-bounces at fuusm.org<mailto:women-bounces at fuusm.org>> on behalf of nancy wolske via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
>> Sent: Saturday, February 6, 2021 12:18 PM
>> To: A List for the Women of FUUSM <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
>> Cc: nancy wolske <nwolske17 at yahoo.com<mailto:nwolske17 at yahoo.com>>
>> Subject: Re: [Women] Women's Group Feb. 10 Absolutely.
>>
>>
>> Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone
>>
>>
>> On Saturday, February 6, 2021, 12:10 PM, Cindy Brown via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>>
>> I'd like to just reiterate Teresa's earlier email - this conversation really should not be taking place on such a large list. I'm quite uncomfortable with this knowledge that I have no right to possess.
>> ThanksCindy
>> On Sat, Feb 6, 2021 at 11:55 AM Chris via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>>
>> I did not know this about Paul Dunn. I do not know the names of the women he harassed before he left. Let me know their names  or keep them provate. That is okay with me. I am on the Board as well as Beth Lapore and Nancy Luthy. So if anyone has information you want us to bring up at the Board meeting on Monday, let one of us know. My though right now is someone or Kat should confront him when he returns. Tell him he is welcomed into our community, but his behavior will not be tolerated. Well, something like that. Give one of us feedback for the meeting and I will share with you what I learned at the Board meeting. Chris
>> From: Maureen <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
>> To: A List <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>>
>> Cc: Maureen <maureenolander at gmail.com<mailto:maureenolander at gmail.com>>
>> Date: Saturday, 6 February 2021 10:13 AM EST
>> Subject: Re: [Women] Women's Group Feb. 10
>>
>> I have a couple of thoughts based on harassment at my workplaces:  First, it does no good to mildly rebuke the harasser. My first harasser used to ogle and leer whenever I approached his desk, which I had to do frequently. He was sitting on a high stool (he was a dispatcher) and one day I accidentally brushed his crotch area. He started hooting and I just snapped. I said very loudly “John, f*** off!” There was dead silence in the dispatcher’s room for several minutes. I never had a problem again. Make a stink. Be loud.  The second technique is based on advice to document workplace incidents, when, where and what. I wrote a letter to my harasser recounting what he did and when and asking him to stop. When the time was right I used it with satisfactory results. In all my experiences I was harassed by men whom I’d turned down for a date or had otherwise hurt their little egos, no matter how gently. Remember that these incidents are all about revenge and aggression, so respond accordingly. It sounds like we need a UU Me Too.
>>  Shalom, Maureen Hope
>>
>> On Feb 5, 2021, at 9:53 AM, Teresa Hayes via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>>  FYI:  This was sent to all of the women's group not to Karen or Rebecca alone.
>>
>> I don't object to this being sent to everyone, but I do want to point out that there are two reply arrows that one can use on e-mails. The single arrow replies to the person who sent the e-mail and the double arrow replies to the entire group, in this instance to the women's group.  In many cases it's important to be sure who you are replying to.
>>
>> Since it came to everyone, I wanted to offer an opinion.  It's important for the woman who is being harassed to step into her own power and let Paul know his advances are unwanted.  I know some women do not feel capable of doing this, so it is up to each of us who do, to step forward and support our sisters until they do feel empowered enough to speak for themselves.  After all, Paul is not the only man in our community who might sexually harass a woman.  By community I mean our church community, work community, larger community, any community of which a woman may be a member.
>>
>> So, standing on the side of love for my sisters, I suggest we formulate a plan to let Paul know that his advances and sexual harassment will not be tolerated.  And we need to base this upon either existing church policy, or develop a church policy that addresses sexual harassment.  It really is no more difficult than we make it.
>>
>> If anyone wishes to reply to me personally about this, please feel free to do so. teresa_asselinhayes_2000 at yahoo.com<mailto:teresa_asselinhayes_2000 at yahoo.com> or 740-350-6249 On Thursday, February 4, 2021, 2:43:14 PM EST, Annie Warmke via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>> Karen;  Here's what I'd like to speak about.
>>
>> This has to do with Paul Dunn and his sexual harassment of at least four women in the months before he left.  It is reported that he is returning in a few days so this is very worrisome me that women are not safe in our church family.  I am concerned also because four came forward but how many others are there?  Initially (July 2019) a man spoke from church spoke to me about Paul and asked what to do.  I suggested he go to the board president and Kat.  He did do that but nothing came of it.
>>
>> Now that Paul is returning the man who spoke up is very concerned, and spoke to me again.  I asked him to talk to Kat and the board to find out what our policy is on handling sexual harassment.  He was told that they would work on it on Monday at the board meeting.  That made me wonder if there is a policy, and if so, why weren't they adhering to it?
>>
>> I brought the initial report up at the Women's mo. meeting in Aug. 2019 and asked what could be done.  There was a discussion but nothing came of it.  I don't feel we should be the ones taking the lead on this.  It is the men who must step up and support the one who initially brought it to everyone's attention.
>>
>> It is clear something needs to be done before Paul returns.  Shouldn't we, as a women's group make a statement about sexual harassment and how we want it dealt with?  I cannot look away.  Annie
>> On 2/4/2021 1:33 PM, Karen Binkley via Women wrote:I am available to talk if you would like. Karen Binkley
>>
>> Sent from my iPhone
>>
>> On Feb 4, 2021, at 12:41 PM, Annie Warmke via Women <women at fuusm.org<mailto:women at fuusm.org>> wrote:
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> Do you have time for me to call you to talk about a problem that, as women, we may want to address?  Annie
>>
>>
>> On 2/4/2021 11:43 AM, Rebecca Phillips via Women wrote:Greetings, women of FUUSM, Just a reminder that our monthly meeting will be next Wednesday, February 10, at 7:00 PM. We will be using the church Zoom link (copied below). Our theme is the UU theme of "Side With Love," so please bring an example, anecdote, poem, whatever on ways that you/we have sided with love for people, animals, the planet. . .  https://zoom.us/j/94822183499?pwd=ZVhkMHZWSnR1bTI5czZWRk1zdFFmQT09Meeting ID: 948 2218 3499 Passcode: fuusm2323Hope to see you then! Rebecca "If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need."-- Cicero
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>> --
>> Annie Warmke
>> Farmer, activist, consultant, writer
>> Blue Rock Station/Warmke Farm LLC
>> www.bluerockstation.com<http://www.bluerockstation.com>
>> (740) 674-4300 or (740) 252-6295 Mobile
>>
>> Radio: When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
>> WOUB Digital Wednesday 9 am
>> WGRN Digital Friday 11:30 am & Saturday 8:30 am
>>
>> Publications:
>> The Business of Goat Herding (BRS Media)
>> The Journey Toward Nothing (BRS Media)
>> Naturally Healthy Goats (BRS Media)
>>
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>> When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
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>> Annie Warmke
>> Farmer, activist, consultant, writer
>> Blue Rock Station/Warmke Farm LLC
>> www.bluerockstation.com<http://www.bluerockstation.com>
>> (740) 674-4300 or (740) 252-6295 Mobile
>>
>> Radio: When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
>> WOUB Digital Wednesday 9 am
>> WGRN Digital Friday 11:30 am & Saturday 8:30 am
>>
>> Publications:
>> The Business of Goat Herding (BRS Media)
>> The Journey Toward Nothing (BRS Media)
>> Naturally Healthy Goats (BRS Media)
>>
>> Podcasts: bluerockstation.com<http://bluerockstation.com>
>> When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
>> Arriving at Blue Rock Station_______________________________________________
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--
Annie Warmke
Farmer, activist, consultant, writer
Blue Rock Station/Warmke Farm LLC
www.bluerockstation.com<http://www.bluerockstation.com>
(740) 674-4300 or (740) 252-6295 Mobile

Radio: When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
WOUB Digital Wednesday 9 am
WGRN Digital Friday 11:30 am & Saturday 8:30 am

Publications:
The Business of Goat Herding (BRS Media)
The Journey Toward Nothing (BRS Media)
Naturally Healthy Goats (BRS Media)

Podcasts: bluerockstation.com<http://bluerockstation.com>
When the Biomass Hits the Wind Turbine
Arriving at Blue Rock Station

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