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<DIV>Thank you to Rev Kat for suggesting this type of discussion be taken away
from all inclusive emails, as well as the grievance procedures which should be
followed. I see it has not happened. Thank you Cindy Brown, I whole-heartedly
agree with your statement. Thank you Melinda Mc. for the informational
links provided. Thank you Robin for your sensible comments. </DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>I am responding to all because I want you to know I am asking Ralph to
remove me from the list for women. Without intending to be hateful, I feel as if
this discussion online to all is unwarranted, and amounts to spreading gossip.
True or false is not up to me to decide, but it really does harm to others when
it comes across as trial by fire without the benefit of the accused being
present. I no longer wish to participate. </DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>I do hope if any harm has been done that it will be resolved in a fair
manner without the hearsay of “he said, they said”. </DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Best Wishes</DIV>
<DIV>Brenda Lisk</DIV>
<DIV>Over and Out </DIV>
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<DIV style="font-color: black"><B>From:</B> <A title=women@fuusm.org
href="mailto:women@fuusm.org">Annie Warmke via Women</A> </DIV>
<DIV><B>Sent:</B> Tuesday, February 09, 2021 12:15 PM</DIV>
<DIV><B>To:</B> <A title=women@fuusm.org
href="mailto:women@fuusm.org">women@fuusm.org</A> </DIV>
<DIV><B>Cc:</B> <A title=annie@bluerockstation.com
href="mailto:annie@bluerockstation.com">Annie Warmke</A> </DIV>
<DIV><B>Subject:</B> Re: [Women] Women's Group Concerns</DIV></DIV></DIV>
<DIV> </DIV></DIV>
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<P>Thank you for your thoughts Michelle Wilson. Thank you for reiterating
that this has been an issue since 2019 and the process that took place or
didn't, to deal with it. I want to explain, again the sequence of events
that led me to bring this issue out into the open.</P>
<P>I've had quite a back lash for speaking up in this way. It feels really
bad to ask that women and children feel safe from bullying and harrassment and
then be attacked for addressing it in a way that makes it less possible to brush
it under the rug. I know these are sensitive issues that we often don't
know how to talk about, but none-the-less, if four women came forward, how many
more are out there. Some of us know the names of these women, and
know that Roger did his due diligence.</P>
<P>Don't we have an obligation to let our members know that we are concerned and
want to offer support to those that may have had this (or other similar)
experiences? "Siding with love" sometimes means "tough" love and sometimes
that means putting everything out into the open for safety. <BR></P>
<P>As a side note: I spoke up in Aug. 2019 when the women's group was here
for dinner, and out of that meeting the women's group put together a
self-defense class. I waited to see what would be done by those who had
the ability to do something about it, and then the person in question moved
away. The reason I spoke up again last week is that I found out the person
in question was planning to return to live here so he could come back to the
church and to his friends. That set off an alarm for me. I am
grateful to Roger Kalter for his attempts to do the right thing since at least
July 19th when he first asked my advice.</P>
<P>It is the men who need to step up to the plate on these issues. They
should be disturbed that we don't have policies in place that have the potential
ability to offer protection to those (men and women, girls and boys) who can be
subjected to bullying and harassment, or worse. I am glad to see some of
our male members offering some input. <BR></P>
<P>Again, thanks Michelle. I appreciate your weighing in. Annie
Warmke<BR></P>
<DIV class=moz-cite-prefix>On 2/9/2021 10:38 AM, Michelle Wilson via Women
wrote:<BR></DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE
cite=mid:CA+H-9xfUKxyjXBJCYNhbPN4w8qneeObUPx8uwWDqxJO5rQ9eOw@mail.gmail.com
type="cite">
<DIV dir=ltr>
<DIV>At some point we have to do something... What's the next step? Who
specifically do we contact?</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>I know of information first hand and I know the man who is
bringing up concerns went and spoke to each woman individually to verify the
information. He was trying to get something done by working with the mens
group. I hate to be negative but it feels like herding cats. At some point,
action needs to be taken. It's been several years now. So, what is the next
step? I don't know of the other cases but the one I'm familiar with we already
very directly addressed the person causing the issue and that did absolutely
nothing. In my family, he was addressed by three separate people and we were
not careful to be nice. He doesn't see a problem.
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>At this point we need to address it as an organization. If we need to
reach out to the committee on ministries, who specifically should we contact?
Also, it seems pointless to contact anyone if nothing will be done. I expect a
timeline and action or why even bother complaining. I totally understand why
this got posted to the larger group. It feels like inaction and that is very
frustrating.</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>I'm not trying to cause a problem but if we can't even address an obvious
issue like this then what are we doing?</DIV>
<DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
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<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV class=gmail_quote>
<DIV class=gmail_attr dir=ltr>On Mon, Feb 8, 2021 at 3:00 PM revkat--- via
Women <<A href="mailto:women@fuusm.org"
moz-do-not-send="true">women@fuusm.org</A>> wrote:<BR></DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE class=gmail_quote
style="PADDING-LEFT: 1ex; MARGIN: 0px 0px 0px 0.8ex; BORDER-LEFT: rgb(204,204,204) 1px solid">It
is most respectful to share concerns in person or on Zoom,and address
matters in clear and direct communication with those who have a
grievance. It appears less so to use email. I myself have
experienced great damage to relationships and community through unwise and
unkind email postings.<BR><BR>We do affirm and promote a "Safe Congregation"
based on our FUUSM Affirmation and I share here a portion of the Policy
Manual on Grievance Resolution.<BR><BR><BR>[ 2021 ] First Unitarian
Universalist Society of Marietta<BR>Current members of the Commitee on
Ministries:<BR>Rev. K. Hawbaker, Ron Rees, Nina Redd & John
Kidd.<BR><BR>Conflict Resolution and Grievance Procedure<BR>Adopted by the
Board of Trustees, April 9, 2003<BR><BR>1. All
congregants and staff members are expected to endeavor to settle differences
and conflicts by use of clear, direct, honest and loving communication with
the parties concerned. The grievance procedure should be followed in
cases where such communication fails to bring satisfactory
resolution.<BR><BR>2. Any grievances must be
submitted to the Committee on Ministries. If needed, to meet this
requirement, congregants appointed by the Committee on Ministries will
provide assistance. The person initiating the action and any
associates who wish to participate in this action must sign the written
grievance document. The document must indicate the date on which it is
properly submitted.<BR><BR>3. Any grievance
between any parties of the FUUSM community must be
<BR> submitted in this documented
form to the Committee on Ministries.
<BR><BR><BR><BR><BR>_______________________________________________<BR>Women
mailing list<BR><A href="mailto:Women@fuusm.org" target=_blank
moz-do-not-send="true">Women@fuusm.org</A><BR><A
href="http://fuusm.org/mailman/listinfo/women_fuusm.org" rel=noreferrer
target=_blank
moz-do-not-send="true">http://fuusm.org/mailman/listinfo/women_fuusm.org</A><BR></BLOCKQUOTE></DIV><BR>
<FIELDSET class=mimeAttachmentHeader></FIELDSET> <PRE class=moz-quote-pre wrap="">_______________________________________________
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</PRE></BLOCKQUOTE><PRE class=moz-signature cols="72">--
Annie Warmke
Farmer, activist, consultant, writer
Blue Rock Station/Warmke Farm LLC
<A class=moz-txt-link-abbreviated href="http://www.bluerockstation.com">www.bluerockstation.com</A>
(740) 674-4300 or (740) 252-6295 Mobile
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Arriving at Blue Rock Station</PRE>
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